It is believed that William Shakespeare wrote what would later become the most famous love story of all time – Romeo and Juliet – between 1591 and 1595. A quote from this tragic play is:
“Don’t waste your love on somebody, who doesn’t value it.”
It’s safe to say these words are as true as they were almost 450 years ago and what better way to honour the playwright than to take inspiration from his words. My guess is that you, dear reader, have experienced unrequited love before, much like rest of us. It happens. You love someone but they don’t love you back. The healthy way to deal with this is to recognise the truth and move on. Yet sometimes, people become so wrapped up in a relationship, it seems impossible for them to see just how unhealthy that relationship is. Read on and discover the signs of a bad relationship:
Your partner puts you down
If your partner calls you names, ridicules you or makes you feel like an idiot in private or in front of others then they are no good for you! No one should be made to feel inferior or stupid in a loving relationship and if that’s happening to you, it’s time to leave.
You are keeping secrets
If you can’t tell your family or friends about the things your partner says and does, then you may not be in a healthy loving relationship. If you lie to protect him/her, you devalue your own principles and could damage other important relationships.
Your partner wants you to change
If you new partner is very critical of the things you do and the way you look, it’s safe to say they do not truly love you. In a healthy relationship you don’t have to apologise for who you are. A healthy relationship will get your confidence to grow. In an unhealthy one it will shrink.
You feel bad, guilty, unhappy, depressed, or sad about your relationship
A loving and good relationship is happiness, equality, respect and kindness. If you don’t feel secure, comfortable and loved in your relationship, then you may be with the wrong person.
Your partner doesn’t trust you
Constant phone calls, texts, emails and demands on your time. Jealous fits and angry accusations are NOT signs of love! If your partner doesn’t trust you or accuses you of lying, then you need to re-evaluate your love. Opening your post or showing up at work unexpectedly, means they don’t trust you. This is a sign of deep insecurity, which could lead to more serious relationship problems.
Your partner controls everything
Your partner making all the decisions may give you the illusion you are with a confident person but the need to control every aspect your life together is often another sign of deeply rooted insecurities. These are not easily dealt with and can be a sign of bad times ahead. A healthy relationship is a democracy, not a dictatorship.
You constantly argue about financial issues, family matters, or goals for your future and can’t seem to agree on your plans for the future. Perhaps it’s time to rethink this relationship. Nobody has the exact same plans for the future, but the happiest couples have the same goals and desires.
Your loved ones don’t approve of your relationship
No one should choose their partner based on their family and friends’ opinions, but it’s still important to take their opinions into consideration. If your family or friends have strong reservations about your partner, seek specific reasons. Find out the root of their feelings, and try to be objective.
Saying they love you but not showing it
We’ve all done things in the past that have upset others, often unintentionally. But doing something knowingly that will upset the other person clearly shows a lack of respect. If your partner doesn’t care about your needs and wants, it’s really not healthy.
Be honest with yourself – the sooner you face the truth, the sooner you can start over. Everyone has a right to be happy and to be loved for who they are.
Does any of the above resonate with you? Have you been in an unhappy relationship? What made you decide to end it?
Your comments are as always welcome.
Congratulations to Andy and Gwen, who met on Plenty More Fish. We are very happy for you and wish you continued happiness!
We decided to try this site in October. After a couple of winks and a few messages to each other we decided to exchange phone numbers. I was nervous I wouldn’t have anything to talk about, or that I’d clam up, but we actually had a lot in common. After a couple of weeks chatting to each other we met for the first time on November, 8th 2012. We had a day out in South Shields and had a really good time together. A week later we decided to start a relationship or as Gwen said, “We’ll give it a go and take things slowly.” It just goes to show there is someone for you out there and online dating really does work. Thank you very much for finding my soul mate, if it wasn’t for you I’d still be on my own.
Andy & Gwen
Have you found what you were looking for on Plenty More Fish? Please get in touch. Send us an email and include a pic if you can and we’ll give you a shout out!
Happy dating, Maz x
Hi fellow daters!
Just received an email of Wendy. She met her Phil on Plenty More Fish and we think that’s pretty fab, right? So here’s a big cyber kiss :-* from us to Wendy for sharing their story and we hope you guys the best and happiest future together! x
Phil mentioned that he was on Plenty More Fish and I thought that I’d give it a try. We saw each others profiles and made contact online. We’d met previously, but it was fun having a chat and interesting to read what interested the both of us. We got to know one another and the friendship developed; we met at our local modern jive group, as we both enjoy dancing and have very similar interests. When we danced, our eyes met and it was as if the rest of the world vanished. We now see each other every day, were inseperable!
Thank you P.M.F, you helped to bring us two together. We’ll have to see whats in store for us now, but we ll keep you up to date!
Wendy & Phil
Ready to go fishing? Cast your net at Plentymorefish.com . Registration is FREE and you could be browsing for singles in your area right away!
Time to spread the luurve and share another success story with you. Say ‘Hi’ to Tim and Sherrie who met on Plenty More Fish!
I decided that I was at the stage in my life where I felt ready to move on, my wife passed away late 2010. I posted up to date photos, a totally honest profile and used the sites messaging service to begin with, trying to be interesting but also interested in the people I was talking to. Luckily I seemed to hit it off with one person in particular (Sherrie). Within a week we had swapped phone numbers and were talking most nights. We agreed to meet and went for lunch in Covent Garden. We had a great time and actually spent the whole afternoon and evening together! We have been in regular contact since.
Tim & Sherrie
We love Tim’s positive attitude toward dating and it looks like it paid off. We hope you guys have a great future together.
Maz & Plenty More Fish Team x
This morning the Earth drifted through an astronomical checkpoint marking the official start of spring in the northern hemisphere. Everyone at Plenty More HQ is looking forward to longer and hopefully sunnier days. Bet you are too.
Spring means the rebirth of fauna and flora. The birds are singing and the bees buzzing and we all start to feel more alive. Love is in the air and if you are single, this is the best time to up your game and get yourself noticed. So out with the old, in with the new as they say. Change your look, do something you’ve always wanted to do or stop something that no longer makes you happy. ‘Cause as we keep saying, happy peeps are seriously attractive.
So, how do you ramp up your phwoar-factor?
Spring Tip No 1: Try new things
It’s not very enticing to get out and do things during the dark and damp winter months, but as the days are getting longer this is the ideal time to try something you haven’t tried before. Get out of your rut and into something new. Doing something different puts the ZING back into your life and gives you something exciting to talk about on your dating profile. And who knows, Mr/Ms Right might find that particular subject really interesting.
Spring Tip No 2: Do things differently
It’s easy to get into habits. But how boring is that? Routines may be comforting, but doing the same things day in day out, will give you the same results. Changing your routine will spice things up again, give you a different perspective and get you to notice new things and people again. So when you are online, try a new search, change your profile, add new photos and go on dates with different types of people. Broaden your horizons and maybe that special someone you’ve been looking for was there all along, you just didn’t see.
Spring Tip No 3: Let go
Letting go of past hurt is one of the best ways to increasing happiness and bringing that joie de vivre back. Dwelling in the past will keep you firmly there, so let go and give yourself permission to move on. Remember? This is a new beginning.
Spring Tip No 4: Be positive
Dates gone wrong or a lack of dates can be disheartening and frustrating. But hang in there and don’t take it personal. Everything happens for a reason so try to find the positive lessons to take away and then cast your net again….remember, there’s plenty more fish in the sea! 😉
Spring Tip No 5: Fall in love
…with yourself. Being in tune with who you are and knowing what you want in life is one of the most attractive qualities a person can posses. So in the words of Nat King Cole: “Let there be love!”
Here’s to new beginnings and finding love and happiness this spring!
If you liked today’s post please let us know. Get in touch or leave us a comment. x
I read Richard’s profile and instantly thought he sounded like the man for me. I approached him and we spoke on the message service a few times. After a few false starts we persevered and finally met up and I was right, we are perfect for each other. I live in SW London and Richard in Windsor but we try and spend as much time together as possible, we love each other’s company and spend most of our time laughing. If you can believe in love at first sight, then this is it. We are already planning our future together.
Lizzie & Richard
Thank you Lizzie for sending us your success story. There’s no better feeling than being in love, is there? We hope it may never end and wish you both a very happy future together!
If you too believe in love at first sight, why not give Plenty More Fish a go? Who knows, Mr/Ms Right could be waiting for you right now!
Registration is easy and best of all FREE! Click here and meet singles in your area.
If it hadn’t been for your site I would never have met my fiancée who I adore and love so much! After being on your site for a couple of months I eventually received a lovely message from my new partner. We spoke on the phone and then had a wonderful day out together, enjoying a meal and a walk in the park, getting to know one another. Since then we have hardly been apart and are extremely happy. We are planning to get married later in the year. Our families think it’s so lovely that we met and are so happy together.
So we would like to let other people know that your site can be successful and bring people together. Thank you for everything!
Don & Partner
Nothing makes us happier than to read such lovely emails as the one Don just sent us. We are so glad you found each other and wish you an amazing future together. Remember to send us a couple of wedding pics!
Love from your Plenty More Fish team! xxx
Picture this; the end of your first date is approaching and the nerves that were so pertinent at the beginning have now started to vanish. It turns out you and your date are getting along swimmingly and you would love to see them again.
You think they feel the same… but how do you know?
Well, we’ve all been there and to be perfectly honest, there’s no clear way of knowing. This is not such a bad thing though. Imagine if you knew what everyone was thinking…how boring would that be? The fact that there’s no way of telling what your date is thinking or feeling adds to the excitement of it all.
There are some obvious hints that you can pick up on to suggest that your date would like to do this all again. If they go in for a kiss then ahem *alarm bells* you shouldn’t even be reading this…go and arrange that second date NOW! Things like open body language, spending most of the date giggling, long flowing conversations and dropping in sentences like; “oh I know this GREAT restaurant…” can all be humongous (is that even a word?!) hints to suggest you should meet up again.
If you wish to arrange a second date then make it clear after the date or call them shortly after. Just don’t leave too much time between the date and asking…if they are a good catch, they will get snapped up by someone else pretty quickly!
That’s all folks! My top tip would be not to worry about what your date is thinking. They are probably just as busy worrying about what you are thinking! The first date is generally a nerve racking experience but just go with the flow and be yourself! If a second date doesn’t happen then they’re just not the right person for you and you are better off without. Remember, there are plenty more fish in the sea.
It is really important to give yourself this time. As much as you hate the phrase “time is a healer” it is too true. You don’t want to carry over problems from your past relationship to your future one which could lead to pushing away your new partner.
Too many many times I hear; “I’m never going to meet the right person”, “I’m so scared of losing them” or “What if they are just like my ex?!”
Stop panicking! If you carry on holding these negative thoughts, you’re not doing yourself any good in the dating pond. Harsh but true. You will end up pushing partners away. Even if you don’t talk about your fears, your partner will no doubt sense them. Your attitude will change around them through worrying too much or accidentally becoming jealous or possessive. It is advisable that you give yourself enough time for your emotions to settle. It sounds really clichéd but learning to love yourself and knowing that you are in fact a good catch will no doubt draw in more prospective partners.
At PlentyMoreFish.com we know that it is totally up to you to overcome your relationship fears. We know that everyone deals with it in their own individual way. We are however here to provide you with a large selection of potential dates when you feel ready to take the plunge back into the dating pond (it’s not called PlentyMoreFish for nothing!). With our sites simple and easy to use layout (as rated by our members) we try to make your time back on the “dating scene” a little easier and less nerve- racking.