Ever wondered why you continue to fall for “bad boys” time and time again? Well you’re not alone…it seems to be a topic of discussion amongst many celebs; Alexandra Burke, Lady Ga Ga and Beyonce to name a few.
So what is it that leaves us falling for the “wrong type” of guy?
According to a team of boffins at the University of Columbia, us ladies are least attracted to smiling, happy men, instead preferring those who looked proud and powerful or just plain moody. Could explain our attraction to Edward Cullen then…?
However, I’m not so convinced. I can’t speak for all women but I find men MUCH more approachable/ attractive if their profile picture is of a nice friendly looking guy and I will never stop recommending smiling in your profile picture. I can’t really see how women could be attracted to miserable men…*
Is it just me? Am I the odd one? Help me out here!
Jen, PMF x
* OK, Edward Cullen is an exception
P.S. Here’s Alexandra Burke singing about her penchant for bad boys…
“Even though I know they’re no good for me it’s the risk I take for the chemistry.” ……. Alexandra, get yourself on Plenty More Fish. Plenty of happy, smiling guys. You don’t need to go taking these sorts of silly risks!!!
Picture this; the end of your first date is approaching and the nerves that were so pertinent at the beginning have now started to vanish. It turns out you and your date are getting along swimmingly and you would love to see them again.
You think they feel the same… but how do you know?
Well, we’ve all been there and to be perfectly honest, there’s no clear way of knowing. This is not such a bad thing though. Imagine if you knew what everyone was thinking…how boring would that be? The fact that there’s no way of telling what your date is thinking or feeling adds to the excitement of it all.
There are some obvious hints that you can pick up on to suggest that your date would like to do this all again. If they go in for a kiss then ahem *alarm bells* you shouldn’t even be reading this…go and arrange that second date NOW! Things like open body language, spending most of the date giggling, long flowing conversations and dropping in sentences like; “oh I know this GREAT restaurant…” can all be humongous (is that even a word?!) hints to suggest you should meet up again.
If you wish to arrange a second date then make it clear after the date or call them shortly after. Just don’t leave too much time between the date and asking…if they are a good catch, they will get snapped up by someone else pretty quickly!
That’s all folks! My top tip would be not to worry about what your date is thinking. They are probably just as busy worrying about what you are thinking! The first date is generally a nerve racking experience but just go with the flow and be yourself! If a second date doesn’t happen then they’re just not the right person for you and you are better off without. Remember, there are plenty more fish in the sea.
We don’t usually get all soppy on you but after seeing this rather elaborate marriage proposal we just felt we HAD to share!
To anyone who dislikes a slushy story…LOOK AWAY NOW… To the rest of you, enjoy!
Thank goodness she said yes!
- Would you ever suddenly leave your partner without any explanation?
- Do your care much about personal hygiene?
- Will you be ridiculously dependent, or will we still be able to have our own lives?
- Is it okay if we wait a bit before getting intimate?
- Do you really have all these hobbies/ go to all these fantastic places in your spare time or are you just trying to impress?
- What qualifications do you have?
- How much money do you actually make?
- How far would you go on a first date?
- How many online dates have you been on?
- Are you seeing any other people? HOW many other people?
- Do you still talk to your ex and how often?
- When you go to the bathroom, will you remain to leave the door closed in months/years time?
- Do you have any plans to put on weight/lose a ton of weight/take up drugs/change your career/change your religion/change your country of residence, or in any other way drastically alter your life (and mine) in the next couple of years?
- How will we pay for things in the future? Will you always expect me to pay or will be start splitting the bill equally soon?
- Am I someone you could be serious about? How interested or attracted in me are you really?
- How well do you think this this date is actually going? Will you want to see me again?
- Is this an actual date?
So you’re on a date in a restaurant and it’s going brilliantly, there’s an instant attraction and you know that it’s mutual. Oh wait….what’s that sound?… It’s the sound of your date chomping on their food with their mouth wide open whilst talking- Oh no! It’s an instant turn off and all you want to do is go home!
As “mood killer” is a top trend on Twitter, I have spent this afternoon badgering the Plenty More Fish Team to find out what they think are the biggest mood killers on a first date. They have come up with some interesting answers to say the least…I hope most of these have never happened / will never happen on a date! So here’s what the folk at the Plenty More Towers reckon would turn them right off.
- Sloppy language. Using words such as “innit” and “ain’t.” We ain’t really feelin’ that.
- Text talk. Using text talk in your messages before or after (hopefully not during) the date. “CUL8R”, “KTHXBAI.” Not attractive. Just don’t do it.
- Inappropriate touching. There should a limit to touching on a first date. A graze of the arm or a hand on the back is absolutely fine and shows you are interested. A squeeze of the thigh or an unexpected smack on the bum is TOO FAR.
- Over checking your phone. It looks rude and can make you look quite nervous. All your attention should be on your date…well that’s what you’re there for isn’t it? – to date.
- I shouldn’t have to say this but burping and/or farting I don’t even need to justify this with an answer. I just hope no one has actually ever done it!
- Eating like an animal. Take your time, use your knife and fork and just remember your manners. Definitely don’t lick your plate!
- Mentioning your ex. It’s the first date, ex’s should not be brought up- it just makes the other person think you’re not over them and definitely not ready to date. Turn off.
- Bad jokes. Any joke you know may cause offence or is not really that funny should not make an appearance on a first date. It may create a awkward silence and a massive tumble weed situation. Just don’t put yourself/ the other person through it!
When a long – term relationship comes to an end, getting back on the dating scene will be a somewhat daunting experience for most and it is not uncommon for people to be at two extremes when looking for a date. You know that there are plenty more fish in the sea but you may find yourself too picky or not picky enough and this can often hinder your dating experience.
When newly single, being picky or not picky enough is perfectly understandable. After a nasty break up you will want to protect yourself from getting hurt in the future which can often lead to being overly picky with future partners. On the other hand, you may be feeling lonely and miss the company you used to have and therefore find yourself not being picky enough.
You should find a clear balance between the two or it could result in you not finding the happiness you long for in a relationship. It would be a good idea to find out exactly what you are picky about and what you are not picky about in order to find a well- balanced person suited to you.
To help, we have made a list of all the things we feel you should be picky about:
- Similar values, sense of humour and communication style.
- Same future plans…children, marriage etc.
- Someone who cares about you/ your emotions (this should be an obvious one!!!)
- Someone with a job or career (no one wants a lazy partner who is dependent on them!)
- You should be attracted to your partner, someone you should enjoy looking at.
Twitter peeps (AKA Tweeps :)) have most recently been describing the attributes of a good boyfriend/girlfriend. We decided to do a little research and find out exactly what people think this means.
So, according to some great tweeps here’s what makes a good boyfriend:
Now over to the guys. What do you look for in a good girlfriend…?
So that’s what the twitter folk are saying right now. Pssstt.. Maybe fella number 2 would have a good girlfriend if he were a little tidier 😉
MATCHMAKER ALERT. We think we have made a match made in heaven here. To the guy looking for a #goodgirlfriend, we think you would totally get on with the lady wishing to find a #goodboyfriend. Our work is done here…*skips off* 🙂
According to anthropologist, Helen Fisher we are all attracted to a particular type. This type could be an “Explorer”, “Builder”, “Negotiator” or “Director.” To discover your type according to Fisher you can take the online quiz here. However, as we found, you have to enter a Zip code rather than a postal code such as; “32043”, so if you enter this it should work! Oh- It’s quite a lengthy quiz so make sure you have enough time to spare!!!
The explorer tends to be “risk-taking, novelty-seeking, curious, creative, spontaneous, energetic, enthusiastic and optimistic.”
These people are calm, social, popular, cautious, but not fearful. Very managerial, they’re very good at networking and family’s very important to them. They’re traditional, conventional, often religious.
They’re direct, decisive, tough-minded and often understand music very well because music is very structural. They’re competitive, ambitious and very good at spatial relations.
These people see the big picture. They’re very flexible, imaginative and intuitive. They’re compassionate and verbal.
Who suits who?
Explorer types tend to be drawn to other explorers because they want somebody who’s energetic and enthusiastic, adventurous, curious and creative.
The Builder types, who are very traditional, cautious, skilled socially and into their family also go for people like themselves.
But the Director goes for the negotiator and the negotiator goes for the director. The director doesn’t have the people skills that the negotiator has and therefore is drawn to them because they’re gracious, verbal and compassionate. The negotiator is drawn to the director for the opposite reason.
So what type are you and which type do you go for?!