Many of us now find themselves in a long-distance – or should we say – socially acceptable distance relationship and are worried if their connection is going to last. To be honest, being apart from your significant other can suck, especially if the relationship is new and all you really want is to snuggle up close. So we’ve asked couples who’ve gone the distance, literally and figuratively, to give some tips on how to keep the spark going during lockdown.
Get some virtual Face to Face Time
With all the technological advances we have at our disposal, tech is definitely your best friend when it comes to staying connected. It makes long-distance relationships infinitely easier but many of us are used to using messaging apps and text rather than using video. This is definitely a key element in a long-distance couple’s toolbox. FaceTime each other during cooking or do some exercise together.
Set Clear Boundaries
When video chatting – set clear boundaries. For example, you should not record the conversation or share anything you wouldn’t want your grandmother to see. It’s best to avoid circumstances that may cause your partner to feel awkward or undermined. You don’t have to check in or get consent for each social connection with your partner, however, you both should define clear limits and decide what works for the both of you and then stick to those rules.
Have fun together despite the distance
Don’t let the physical distance stop you from doing things together. Watch a film or have a romantic dinner together via a video app. Talk about the meal you’ve prepared, what you like about the wine etc. Just like a normal date – without the waiter. Or have a fun quiz or karaoke night – you can even patch your other friends in.
In the absence of a goodnight kiss schedule a nightly video call to wish each other sweet dreams just before you turn off the lights and if you’re adventurous spice things up with some sexy time describing what’s happening beneath the sheets.
Understand that physical distance can be a trigger for fear and insecurities which can lead to needy or controlling behaviour that may ultimately cause friction and sometimes the very thing you are dreading. Don’t let these insecurities take over and try not to lean on your lover for all your emotional needs. Speak to family and friends often, practice self-care through exercise or with a hobby.
Create a routine
Sticking to a set schedule will help you both to really focus on the relationship when you’re together. To keep the spark during a physical distance spell, it’s vital you know when you’ll see the other person – much like the future getaway you’ll be planning – as it creates a sense of security and familiarity.
Make plans for the future
Just because we are on lockdown now doesn’t mean you can make plans for the future now. Plan your next romantic getaway or holiday for when things have returned to normal. Make it really detailed and vivid. Talk about the foods you’ll enjoy, what the weather will be like – almost as if you’d been there already. Your brain doesn’t know the difference and it’ll be something to look forward to and keep you bonded.
Looking for love? Find likeminded singles over on Plentymorefish.com.
As most of the world has gone into lockdown and people are self-isolating, the task of keeping your dating life going requires a bit more creativity as well as technology. Here are some great games to play whilst in isolation.
Go on a double date
Download the Houseparty app – a free group video chat platform, and invite another couple to go on a double date or go big and invite your friends for a virtual party. The app already comes loaded with in-app games so you can dive right in.
Get musical with “Guess the Tune”
In this game, you have to try and guess a song by singing the song using only the word “doo”. This may sound easy but it’s actually pretty challenging and always hilarious. All you need is a list of songs (just search the web) and a timer. Make it interesting by adding a caveat for the loser – like removing an item of clothing.
Get sporty playing basketball
All you both need for this game is a paper basket and rolled-up socks. Move the basket away as far as possible and then shoot some hoops. The person with the highest score in a set amount of time or tries wins. The loser has to complete a predetermined penalty like doing 20 push-ups.
Play “Would you Rather”
This one is a fun way to get to know each other better. Would you rather kiss an actual frog or give a public speech? Swim with sharks or jump out of a plane? Would you rather have dinner with Ironman or Batman? Get creative, the weirder the better!
Have an Omelette Challenge
You may have seen this one done on a cookery show. Go to your kitchen and get out some eggs. The goal of this game – besides eating an omelette afterwards #dinnerdate – is who can cook an edible omelette in the fasted time. Ready. Steady. Cook!
Have a Naughty Truth or Dare
Last but not least, the eternal classic – Truth or Dare. You can keep it clean or make it naughty, the choice is yours. Here are some deliciously sinful questions we found online to get you started.
- What’s the most unusual place you’ve made love?
- What sex act have you done that you’ll never do again?
- What do you like during foreplay?
- What’s the best orgasm you’ve ever had?
- When was the last time you masturbated?
- What is your favourite position?
- How do you feel when touching yourself?
Still looking for love? Find fun-loving singles on Plentymorefish.com today.
No matter where you are, Corona Virus is being mentioned. Right now, you can’t turn on the TV or boot up your mobile without seeing a warning or an update on the current situation. But, we are here to put your mind at rest, as well as giving you some ideas on how best to take your mind off the outside world!
Plenty More Silver Fish is an online dating site that was purpose-built to bring together mature singles who are vibrant, fun and want to find new friendships, companionship and even romance. It is a site that works hard to put the fun back into dating for mature singles who are looking for more than a few messages and nothing more.
Our mature dating site offers you the opportunity to search, chat and connect with mature and like-minded singles – many of whom may also be affected by the Corona Virus. The site is easy to use and we’ve taken the stress out of online dating as a silver single so that you can concentrate on finding exactly what you’re looking for!
Plenty More Silver Fish can help not only take your mind off being in self-isolation but also put you in contact with some brilliant silver singles in your local area. You can search for singles in all sorts of ways. You can use our brilliant search features to search for singles by their age, location, appearance and even whether they still work or are retired or whether they are academic so that you can spend your time chatting about literature and the books that you love. If you’d like to chat and connect with someone that has grown up children and even grandchildren – check ✅. Looking to bond with someone who loves nature and gardening, you can do that too!
Our goal at Plenty More Silver Fish is to help you to see how fun and easy online dating can be! We know that you may have heard horror stories in the past and we all know someone who knows someone who had a terrible time with online dating, but that doesn’t have to be you.
Our members are vibrant and positive and they are all looking for new connections and love in their silver years. They want to find someone who is interesting, open and honest. They want to laugh and chat and even flirt with someone that gives them butterflies!
Online dating is fun with The Silver Pond and with everything happening just outside your front door, there’s never been a better time to find some new friends online and venture into new, fun territory!
If you’d like to become a member of Plenty More Silver Fish, you can for free. You’ll be able to create your own profile and add photos of yourself. Then you’ll be able to start searching for fellow singles just like you!
Finding yourself back in the dating world after a divorce or long-term relationship can be a daunting process, particularly if you have children to consider. But getting back on the dating horse doesn’t have to be difficult as long as you keep a few things in mind when it comes to your kids.
Take your time
There’s no need for rushing to introduce your new partner to the kiddos unless the relationship is getting serious. Make sure you are both on the same page and discuss how you want to approach this. You wouldn’t want your kids to become attached to your new squeeze only to have them experience the loss of someone they liked.
Telling your new partner about your children is a given and he/she should really know from the very beginning. If he or she doesn’t like children or can not accept you are a parent, it’s pretty clear they aren’t right for you. Save yourself the heartbreak and move on.
Being honest with your children about your new love is vital to have them on board. They will smell BS a mile away, so try and be as honest with them as possible about your relationship. It’s important that you reassure them and explain that they will always be the most important people your life, no matter what.
Accept that your kids may be slow to warm up to your new partner. If that’s the case, don’t push the relationship on them too quickly. Give them time.
Let your children know that your new significant other isn’t intended to replace your ex — ever. This way, they don’t have to feel as though they have to choose or that they betray the other parent.
Many children cling onto the hope that their parents will get back together for a long time and may struggle to come to terms with it. When you’ve moved on to a new partner, the finality of your split becomes more real to your children, which may bring out feelings of jealousy, anger, and fear in them, so talk to them about their feelings and let them express their emotions without judgement. Gently remind them that mummy or daddy are also people who deserve to be happy, even if it’s with someone else.
Do you have any other advice for single parents looking to date? Share it with us by leaving a comment.
Ready to get back out there? Find single parents in your area over in the Plentymorefish Single Parent Pond.
As exhilarating as first dates can be, they are also often mild panic-inducing – imma right? There’s the question of what to wear? Where to meet? What to do? What to talk about?
Sometimes the conversation flows freely, other times it needs a little, um, help and on other occasions, you get a cacophony of crickets. But we’re not here to talk about those latter moments. I want to address the ones that need a little inspiration to get going and that often turn out to be quite interesting.
The key in any conversation is ‘connection’. Imagine sitting opposite someone who keeps looking around whilst you are telling them about your last holiday. They are clearly not sending signals of ‘hey, I’m listening, keep talking!’ Practising active listening is a great way to make the other person heard and for a connection to take place. Once you noticed the connection (relaxed face and body, smiling) steer topics to things you and your date may already have in common and try to draw parallels.
Expand on what you already know about your date from your initial chats/conversations to keep the momentum flowing. As an example tell them what attracted you to their profile such as their love of reading. You can ask them about their favourite author, genre, book, place to read. If you’ve been set up by a friend discuss how each of you knows them.
If you don’t know what you have in common yet, comment on your meeting place (no moaning please!). For example, you could ask if they’ve been to one of your favourite restaurants or bars. From there you could hop onto favourite cuisines, best cocktail bars, music etc. Picking up clues what your date responds to makes them and in turn, you, relax.
We have a signal
Once you’ve established a connection you can move onto deeper topics. What’s your date good at? What are they passionate about?
‘Tell me about your family.’ Can be a very enlightening conversation. Even if their story isn’t positive you can empathise (‘Wow, that sounds really hard. How did you deal with that?’) thereby giving you an even greater chance to connect
Asking about their friends is also a good way to get to know your date on a deeper level. Check-in on their long-term friends. Why have they been friends for so long? A lack of those types of relationships is usually a bad sign.
Going even deeper by discussing their aspirations for life or philosophical questions may seem like scary topics to tackle on a first date, so you can leave these for later dates. Perhaps it’s best to avoid topics like marriage and children on the first date. Instead, ask your date about what their perfect life would look like or who they most admire and why. It may be scary to ask these types of questions on a first date but these are often the ones that unearth real compatibility. Be brave, get in there!
Be careful you don’t shoot out question after question. You’re on a date, not interrogating a suspect. Likewise, pay attention to how many questions your date is asking you. Keep in mind that fast-talking is often a sign of nerves. Try asking them if there’s anything they want to know about you might make them feel more confident to ask you a question and get them out of their nervous state. But if your date continues to talk at you rather than with you, you may need to consider if this date worth pursuing or not.
It’s ok to finish a date early (Just say: ‘This was really nice meeting you. I have another commitment in 30 minutes. Let’s get the bill.’)
We hope you find this useful. What topics do you think are great for a first date? Feel free to share them below.
Still looking for a first date? Join Plentymorefish free today and meet singles in your area.
Even the most creative and capable daters need a little bit of inspiration sometimes, so here’s our list for date night ideas in and around Manchester.
First on our list is Mini Golf. This a great activity for couples as it’s active and a lot of fun. When you’re up and moving around it’s easier to avoid awkward pauses or dead conversation. You can talk about the game, or talk around the game with natural breaks build in. You can talk, you can laugh, all while doing something. When you’re done, grab a snack and laugh about the putt you missed. Visit Tree Top Adventure Golf at The Printworks and take yourself and your date on an Amazonian adventure.
Next up is some good old-fashioned Magic! If you’re a fan of Disney, singalongs and fancy dress then check out the Immersive Magical Brunch. They describe the experience as a huge Disney inspired adult boozy sing-along party. I mean, come on! What’s not to love? Get your costumes ready and put on those glass slippers. Grab tickets over at Feverup.
If you’d rather party like it’s 1922 then make sure you head on over to Long Island (O2 Ritz Manchester) for a night of Razzle Dazzle. A lavish and extravagant affair has been assembled to bring you into the secret world of prohibition times gone by. Be sure to be quick though. This is a one night only affair. To Party like Gatsby visit https://events.partylikegatsby.eu/manchester-cabaret-noir/
If ‘dinner & drinks’ is more your thing then you can’t go wrong with The Liar’s Club – one of Manchester’s best cocktail bars. It’s dark and atmospheric interior filled with tiki torches, bamboo and wooden furniture will transport you straight to the Caribbean. The Liars Club offers a staggering choice of exotic tiki cocktails. Why not learn to re-create your favourite cocktails at home at one of their excellent cocktail masterclasses? For more details check out their website https://www.theliarsclub.co.uk/
Still looking for a date? Hop on over to Plentymorefish.com and find singles in your area.
Happy New Year everyone!
We know January is often a tight month budget-wise but fear not! Your dating game doesn’t have to suffer, so we’ve compiled a list of our favourite wallet-friendly dating ideas for all you lovelies in the Brum area.
Jazz it up, baby!
If you love the sound of the jazz and blues get yourself down to the Hare and Hounds in King’s Heath who are hosting several dedicated nights starting January 11th. Take your date and enjoy fantastic live music from some of the country’s premier jazz and blues musicians. Entry is free!
The Great Escape
A locked room and a race against the clock.
You and your teammates have just 60 minutes to solve a series of amazing and puzzling challenges and escape the evil Japanese Warlord, find Blackbeard’s treasure or defeat the Nazis. The choice – and thrill – is yours! Are you up to the challenge? Tickets start from £20 pp for 4-6 players.
This one is for the carnivorous foodies among you (sorry vegetarians/vegans!). If you haven’t tried Polish cuisine, you’ll be in for a pleasant surprise and The Karczma in Digbeth serves up a feast! The menu contains numerous Polish classics including Pierogi (stuffed dumplings), Berszcz (Beetroot soup), Pickled Herring, Zurek (Pickled Rye Flour Soup) served from a hollowed-out loaf of bread, as well as a whole host of grilled meats and fish. Pricewise it’s also very reasonable.
Did you know that darts is very often a couples or dating event in Japan? Many men bring a ‘date’ to play darts as it’s considered ‘user-friendly’ for all types of people and players. So why not visit Birmingham’s Flight Club in Temple Street? Their team reinvented darts for the modern world offering a whole new level of fun with fast-paced, multi-player games.
Add to that a mouth-watering food menu, a signature slushie and delicious cocktails and you have the perfect date night mix.
We hope you enjoyed our suggestions! Let us know your best kept dating tip in your area.
Still looking for that special someone? Hop on over to Plentymorefish.com and find singles in your area today!
Let’s face it, December is an expensive time of year for most of us but your dating life should not have to suffer because of it. So here are our favourite affordable and fun date ideas for this month.
Get your skate one
Remember how much fun you had as a kid whizzing – or crawling – across the ice? Plenty of city centres now have ice rinks at this time of year so there’s really no excuse not to give it a try. Not only is it loads of fun but it is sure you get you very close to your date, especially if they are not as accomplished in the arts of ice skating and will need to hold on to you for balance. Afterwards, you can warm up with a hot toddy and laugh about your sore bottoms.
Have a bake-off
Who doesn’t love the smell of freshly baked Christmas cookies, so why not have a bake-off? Each person picks one recipe and you ask friends and family to judge your efforts. The loser will have to cook the next meal, sing a Christmas carol in front of their family or come up with the next fun date idea. Make it interesting, get creative!
Mix it up
Whilst on the subject of food, we mustn’t forget the impressive art of cocktail making. Mixing your way through different cocktail recipes is another fun way to ‘expand’ your horizons so to speak. You could book one of the many cocktail making classes available, buy a book on the topic or simply Google some recipes to try. You could even create your own signature drink for you both. Wouldn’t that be a cute story to share one day?
Lend a hand
The true meaning of Christmas is to give, so why not spread some cheer and volunteer at a local charity or start a fundraiser to help those less fortunate? You could do a sponsored sleep out, a Santa Fun Run or create a gift-wrapped shoebox full of nice things and send it off to a disadvantaged child. There are so many ways to give (just search ‘Volunteer at Christmas’). It’s sure you make you all warm and fuzzy afterwards. And who knows? This might just be the start of an annual family tradition.
Shake a leg
Hit a local karaoke bar or stay at home to create a playlist with all your favourite Christmas tunes. Have a musical pop quiz or a dance-off in your PJs. You could even write your own nativity play or compose the next Christmas number 1. There are so many ways to have a music-themed date that you’ll be spoilt for choice but you can have some awesome fun. Up the ante and post your creations online for your friends to vote on and spread some cheer. It’s all about having fun!
We hope you like our favourite December date ideas. Have one to share with us? Then drop us a comment!
Still looking for that special someone? Try Plentymorefish.com and find singles near you today!
As if breaking up wasn’t hard enough already, divorcing or separating after many years can feel devastating and the thought of ever loving someone else may seem impossible at first. Most people will experience a sense of grief and go through these 5 stages. They are:
- Denial and isolation
So how do you know if you are ready to get back out there and start dating again? Here are a few things that you should consider before you get back on that proverbial dating horse:
Accept that it’s over
Seems like an obvious one but this is a vital step helping you be open for something new. First, make sure you’ve come to terms with your marriage/relationship being over and that you have accepted it. Reaching this stage can take a long time – sometimes years – so be patient and allow yourself to heal first.
The ex is dating again
Remember that acceptance we’ve just mentioned? That resolve can be tested when you see your ex with someone new for the first time. Be prepared for this to trigger emotions you thought you’d dealt with. Seeing him/her with another partner can really hurt and trigger feelings of jealousy and undo all the positive steps you’ve taken since the breakup. At this point, it is important to remember that it’s ok to feel those emotions but not allow them to overwhelm you. Remembering that you and your ex may be at different stages in life will help you remain objective. And that you both deserve to be happy – even if it’s with someone else.
Meeting the kids
Sit down with your children and talk to them about this step waaay before you start dating again. Especially if your kids are older. Helping them navigate their own grieving process will allow the family to heal as a whole before they reach the stage of acceptance. So be gentle and give them time to get used to the idea of you dating again. Just don’t put it off altogether – you too deserve to be happy!
Begin to redefine who you are outside of the marriage/relationship by spending quality time on your own. Take yourself out to dinner or the cinema. You’ve always wanted to try Salsa dancing but your partner did not? Go and do that! By rebuilding your own sense of identity you’ll get your confidence back and will begin to see all the exciting opportunities out there.
As they say, “Time is the wisest counsellor of all.” I think we can agree that taking time out from dating after a breakup is a good strategy. One way to find out if the time is right to dip your toe in that dating pond again is to try visualising yourself with someone else. If you feel a sense of excitement – great – you are ready! If however, you struggle to do that, it’s safe to say you need a bit more time and space until you can. It’s ok to take as much time as you need!
Every once in awhile you meet someone you fancy the pants off and the chemistry between you is tangible. It’s like electricity and you feel you have met your soulmate. You fall head over heels for this person and the world turns into a cotton candy coloured bouncy castle with zero gravity. There’s no denying it, you are in love.
The first stages of love are the most wonderful moments a person can experience but the can also cloud your perception of reality. Whilst there may be undeniable physical chemistry between you, it doesn’t necessarily mean you are compatible. And if you are looking for a long term relationship, chemistry will only get you so far.
Once the initial stage of ‘love goggles’ wears off, reality sets in and you start to understand the other person more clearly, their beliefs and values, what makes them happy and what not. When these values and beliefs don’t match up with your own, trouble may be ahead. Successful relationships take work and require effort and commitment on both sides and having the same values in life goes a long way to creating a solid foundation.
- Values – Our values are personal to us and affect us at a deep subconscious level. Everything we do and every decision we make is based on our values. They are our guide to what is important to us and can include concepts like education, effort, equality, honesty, perseverance, loyalty, faithfulness…etc.
- Beliefs – Our beliefs on the other hand are our assumptions we make about the world around us. They are shaped by what we see, hear, experience, read and think about and they apply not only how we see ourselves but also how we see other people. Beliefs can be changed, whereas values are part of who you are.
Your values and beliefs make you unique, if you live your life and relationships in conflict with them you will inevitably end up unhappy. To understand what you need in order to be happy is probably the best advice we can give towards finding lasting love. When you know yourself, you will attract the right person into your life. It’s like wearing the correct prescription glasses; suddenly things become more clear and your focus is sharper.
Why not take some time out for yourself this week and seek to understand your values and beliefs? It will go a long way to help you find happiness and love and you deserve both.
Until next week lovely readers! x