Let’s be honest, the dating pond is a vast ocean of opportunities and potential matches. It makes sense that you cast your net wide to increase your chances for reeling in the best catch and dating several people at once is simply being efficient.
Even so, seeing more than one person at any one time is a bit of a juggling act and before we share our tips on how make that easier, it’s worth giving some context. When we refer to ‘dating’ we mean ‘looking for a long-term relationship’ not ‘hooking up’ (that’s what our naughty pond is for). 😈
#1 Be honest
Since we all agree that dating more than one person is a good thing, keeping it hidden from the people you are seeing is not. Telling your dates that you are meeting other people is the mature and decent thing to do. Some of you may protest that it might scare some potential dates away. Yes, that may happen, but if someone is put off by that, they are clearly not on the same page and are probably not a suitable match.
#2 Keep it small
As with other things in life, if we take on too much it becomes a struggle. It’s better to date 5 people than 10 for the simple reason that dating can be tiring. It’s also a good idea to spread out your date over several days and give yourself time to reflect and, you know, have a life. You’ll want to be your best self when looking for that special someone so make sure you don’t overdo the dating.
#3 No Ghosting
When you’ve started to realise that it’s not going to work out with one of your dates, please don’t just ghost them. Be fair and tell him/her that it’s not going to go anywhere and let them down gently. Likewise, if you’re getting serious with someone, it’s time to share that you’re off the market. We all deserve to be treated respectfully.
#4 Be Curious
Really push the boat out and increase your odds of finding love by dating a variety of people. Pick someone you wouldn’t normally go out with. Granted, it may be a bit out of your comfort zone but as the old saying goes, ‘opposites attract’. Or they surprise you and you’ll realise you have more in common than you thought. You won’t know until you’ve tried.
Ready to dive into the dating pool and get fishing for dates? Sign up for free today!
Whilst we may be a generation addicted to selfies and photos, it is safe to say that a well-written quality dating profile will help you stand out in the crowd and catch Mr or Miss Right. The thing is we’re just not very good at selling ourselves, it isn’t in our nature to ‘brag’ about our plus points but in reality this is exactly what you need to do in the world of online dating.
Even if you’re not a budding wordsmith, with a little thought and creativity you can create a knockout dating profile. Still need a guiding hand? Our top tips below will nudge you in the right direction.
Keep it short and sweet
Entice your date with just enough to peak their interest. Here are some good examples:
Sunday fun day 👍🏻 Sunday chill day 👎🏻
Snakes 😍 Moths 😱
Bike ✅ Car ⛔️
Pineapple on pizza > great combo (Perhaps we will be too?)
“She has funny toes.” – My best friend Clare
“Excellent gums. Definitely flosses regularly.” – Sara, my hygienist
“She’s cute, but she snores.” – My mother
“Gentlemen, I wash my hands of this weirdness.” – My ex (actually it was Captain Jack Sparrow in At World’s End but I’m sure my ex would agree)
Kids in your photos
Always a risky one as parents tend to keep their kids off the internet. However, if you are a single parent most of your pictures will contain your kids so a quick disclaimer about who that kid in your photo belongs to are appreciated, but not necessary.
Funny is good. Witty is better.
Unless you’re a natural comedian it will pay dividends to spend some time researching other profiles and taking inspiration from them. Be original and please don’t copy and paste from other profiles.
Must we really say it? Online dating is not the platform to promote your views on your views on mindfulness or inner peace, so please stay clear of inspirational quotes (unless you can turn them into something funny or use it as a topic of why you think it stinks).
I’m this tall…
Gents, refrain from adding your height to your dating bio. Whilst there may be shallow girls out there that open with this question, most of us are better than that!
Lads, contrary to what many of you (90%) may believe, posting shirtless pics can mean on average 25% fewer matches. More than half of the women who’ve been asked said that posting shirtless pics implies a lack of maturity and self-awareness.
Regardless of whether you’re a young professional or one of the many over 40’s daters, making the right first impression is key and a good dating bio can be a great way to introduce yourself.
If you’re looking for a potential date what are the things you look for in a good profile? We’d love for you to share with us your profile ‘deal breakers’.
When you’ve been in the dating pool a while and/or you’ve reached a certain age it’s very likely you’ll date someone who’s had a failed marriage or long-term relationship. But that doesn’t mean that person won’t be a great partner. There are, however, some warning signs to look out for when dating a divorced man.
Separated, not divorced
The first red flag is whether he describes himself as separated rather than divorced. Many women get sucked into a relationship (rebound anyone?) with a separated man, only to find out that he’s still married and actually working on his relationship or that he’s going to remain married, but still separated for the foreseeable future and he never has any plans on getting remarried. So anytime you hear the word separated, translate that into, ‘I’m not available for anything serious’.
Going too fast
The second warning sign is how fast he jumps into a very serious relationship. Oftentimes divorced men are only comfortable with relationships that become very serious, very quickly. They are putt off by the dating process of getting to know the other person and it’s important you slow things down. Even if he is keen to spend a lot of time with you or goes as far as suggesting moving in together, slowing down will give you both time to really get to know each other and see if you are actually compatible in the long run.
Having a negative attitude towards love or being emotionally unavailable is also a red flag. Granted, going through a divorce is one of the most traumatic things a person has to deal with, and it can leave that person bitter and closed off to love. So, if he’s still in a place where he can’t see himself to ever get married again – believe him. He’s not yet moved on and is still reeling from that experience. Let him go, he’s not ready.
Red flag number four is whether he’s depressed or has low self-esteem. As we said earlier divorce is traumatic and it can really take a toll on a person’s mental state and destroy their self-esteem. Divorce has the potential to make you feel like you are not worthy of a relationship, especially if you’ve been cheated on. But remember, it’s not your job to fix him, it’s not your job to try and bring him to a healthy place in his love life. He will need to find that path on his own. Please avoid wasting too much time trying to rehabilitate him when you could be keeping your options open to other people.
Check the ex
If his ex-wife is still a huge part of his life that’s another warning sign you shouldn’t ignore. Now, we get it if he has children with her, they will need to make sure they have an active relationship and maybe even a friendship. But if you’re finding that she’s still a constant part of his life, he’s texting her on a constant basis, always seeing her more than probably would be appropriate, then keep your eyes wide open. There’s still a possibility he might want to win her back.
Kids but no kids
Speaking of children. How’s his relationship with his kids? If he has zero custody of his children doesn’t necessarily mean that there’s a major problem. Nonetheless, it’s a red flag. Typically, the relationship that someone has with their children is very coherent with the relationship they’ll have with other people in their life, but divorces are complicated and messy, so you really want to find out what actually went to get a clearer picture of him.
Now those are the biggest red flags we really want you to be looking for when you’re dating a divorced man, and if you don’t see any of those red flags, then great, go for it! Just because a man was divorced doesn’t mean he’s damaged goods. On the contrary, he actually may have learned a lot from that first marriage and be at a point in his life where he has more clarity about what he wants in a relationship and in a woman.
Ready to find your next date? Check out our divorced singles pond and start chatting to other divorced singles today.
The world’s population is getting older year on year. The UK now has an average life expectancy of 81 years, meaning that finding love is no longer limited to people in their 20s, 30s and 40s. More and more mature singles find themselves diving into the dating pool and often for the first time in a long time. That can be a daunting experience. But don’t worry, we’re here to help you navigate your new and fun dating journey.
Here are our top tips to finding love again in your later years:
- Try something new
Think you can’t teach an old dog new tricks? Think again! Not only is taking up a new hobby good for your brain and mental health, it’s also an excellent way to make new friends and meet likeminded singles. We’re certain there’s always been something you’ve been wanting to try out – choir singing, a cooking class or perhaps learning to tango? The possibilities are endless.
- Get moving
Physical exercise is a great way to improve many aspects of your life – mood, energy and self-esteem! Whether it’s dancing, walking, yoga or swimming, all are set to keep you young and in great shape. There are literally hundreds of clubs and classes looking to welcome you. Why not try something new every week to get you started until you find ‘The One’ you really like?
- Go shopping
Stuck in a rut when it comes to fashion? Now’s the time to ditch the old look and go for something new and fresh! One of the best ways to explore new looks is to get some help from a personal stylist. Many department stores now offer this service and it’s not as expensive as you think. Go on! Invest in yourself – you are worth it.
- Try online dating
If you haven’t tried online dating yet, you are missing out. The beauty of dating apps is that you get to speak to a lot of singles before you meet them. There are many dating sites now catering for mature singles looking to connect and find love – like our Silver Pond.
- Book that trip
It’s time to go on an adventure! Many travel companies now offer solo travellers the opportunity to join likeminded people on a group holiday. Not only will you see amazing new sights, but you’re bound to make new friends and maybe even have a little holiday romance. There’s no excuse not to go on that trip you’ve always dreamt about doing. Which brings us to…
- Be open to possibilities
In other words – start saying yes. Key to meeting new people and finding love is breaking out of your comfort zone and allowing yourself to be open to new opportunities. Much like trying something new – it can feel a little scary at first – but soon you’ll realise that trying new things is fun. It’s time to embrace the possibilities again.
If you’re single and interested in meeting like-minded people, join the Silver Pond over at Plentymorefish.com.
No matter where you are, Corona Virus is being mentioned. Right now, you can’t turn on the TV or boot up your mobile without seeing a warning or an update on the current situation. But, we are here to put your mind at rest, as well as giving you some ideas on how best to take your mind off the outside world!
Plenty More Silver Fish is an online dating site that was purpose-built to bring together mature singles who are vibrant, fun and want to find new friendships, companionship and even romance. It is a site that works hard to put the fun back into dating for mature singles who are looking for more than a few messages and nothing more.
Our mature dating site offers you the opportunity to search, chat and connect with mature and like-minded singles – many of whom may also be affected by the Corona Virus. The site is easy to use and we’ve taken the stress out of online dating as a silver single so that you can concentrate on finding exactly what you’re looking for!
Plenty More Silver Fish can help not only take your mind off being in self-isolation but also put you in contact with some brilliant silver singles in your local area. You can search for singles in all sorts of ways. You can use our brilliant search features to search for singles by their age, location, appearance and even whether they still work or are retired or whether they are academic so that you can spend your time chatting about literature and the books that you love. If you’d like to chat and connect with someone that has grown up children and even grandchildren – check ✅. Looking to bond with someone who loves nature and gardening, you can do that too!
Our goal at Plenty More Silver Fish is to help you to see how fun and easy online dating can be! We know that you may have heard horror stories in the past and we all know someone who knows someone who had a terrible time with online dating, but that doesn’t have to be you.
Our members are vibrant and positive and they are all looking for new connections and love in their silver years. They want to find someone who is interesting, open and honest. They want to laugh and chat and even flirt with someone that gives them butterflies!
Online dating is fun with The Silver Pond and with everything happening just outside your front door, there’s never been a better time to find some new friends online and venture into new, fun territory!
If you’d like to become a member of Plenty More Silver Fish, you can for free. You’ll be able to create your own profile and add photos of yourself. Then you’ll be able to start searching for fellow singles just like you!
Sam & Jacqui – October 2016
“I contacted Jacqui because you advised me of a perfect match.
Our profile was the first attraction.
The first date was at Pitlochrie.
We kissed on the second date at Callander.
We have been with each other nearly every day since.
Plenty laughter in the relationship but no stories to share yet
We hope to travel and have a long and happy future together
Sam & Jacqui”
Congratulations, to Sam & Jaqui who were matched together in our Silver Pond which specialises in dating for over 40’s. We love to hear of a good online dating success story, so if you’ve had success using Plenty More Fish tweet us @plentymorefish.
Autumn is in full swing now and the arrival of shorter days and longer nights may make you want to stay in and chat with your potential date online, but if you can tear yourself away from the digital world there are some great events and eateries that make great alternative ideas for a first date. Here are a mix of things, for the younger and the over 40’s daters, that caught our eye for alternative dates and there’s not a dreary Weatherspoons in sight!
You might or might not be into art but let’s be honest this exhibition will raise an eyebrow or two. This year’s exhibitions include a giant bottom, a made-to-measure suit with a pattern of woven jacquard fabric bricks hanging in space, and 20,436 pennies in a pile surrounded by washed up litter and corrugated iron. All this makes for an unusual day out that will get the humour flowing and strike up a conversation with your partner on just how wacky yet politically poignant some of the work is.
A combination of amazing herby deep fried chicken and cocktails – could just make this the perfect food eatery for a date. The venue is located in Seven Dials which is a cool part of London for wandering about, with some eclectic shops – so this restaurant makes an ideal refuelling point after a day in the city. With a whimsical menu of deep fried chicken (check out The Colonel burger which is fried chicken thigh, buttermilk & herb mayo, cheese, lettuce & pickles) and great sour cocktails (the Negroni Sour is perfect) it is easy to relax here with your date and find some common ground over good food.
This is a seriously cool and retro night out – a roller disco that will hopefully have you head over heels for each other by the end of the night and get you connecting over a love of music old and new, legwarmers, glitter balls and all things old school! A great way to let those first date inhibitions go and just enjoy something different.
For an evening of intensity and drama (of the stage kind we might add!), then you should check out David Hare’s psychological thriller ‘The Red Barn’ which will have you on the edge of your seat. The play is thrilling and chilling and a great alternative to the usual of going to see a movie.
Fear not this is bingo but not as you know it. Forget dusty bingo halls and cheesy number calling – Rebel Bingo is slick, fast and an absolute blast of a night out and a fresh approach to the game. Think hedonistic 90’s clubbing mixed with bingo, add in glitter cannons, raucous number calling and high energy atmosphere as well as some off the wall prizes.
What better way to enjoy the sights and history of London than by taking in the spectacular that is The Lord Mayor’s show? Taking place for over 800 years, this historical event is a lively mixture of London’s past, present and future and culminates in a glorious, colourful cacophony of fireworks over The Thames. The perfect end to a great day out.
London is a fantastic city for finding unusual and different ideas for meeting an online date, and hopefully, this run down of some of the top autumn events will help you to uncover the very best of London, but also secure some brownie points with whoever it is you’re trying to impress for your date.
A little ping just announced the arrival of this wonderful message sent to us by Anne who met her John on Plenty More Silver Fish. Sadly she didn’t send us a picture but this is what she wrote:
I joined the site one year ago, after being alone for several years following an unpleasant divorce and many years alone. I started to enjoy exchanging correspondence through the site with many nice sounding men but none that I felt attracted enough to meet. Then I saw John’s picture and profile. His picture was of a nice looking man, obviously taken on a holiday, sitting relaxed at an outside beach café. His profile told me he was a widower who had been married for over 40 years and lost his wife very suddenly. I liked the way he worded his profile, with total respect of his marriage and his wife. I sent him a message although he lived some 30 miles from me. It was a while before he responded, and then for several weeks we sent brief messages. Then eventually he asked if I would like to meet him for a drink. It was the first time I thought Yes I will do this. We met in a pub car-park very near to me, I was very nervous, we had a nice evening, conversation was easy and flowed. Before the end of the evening he asked me if I would like to meet again and I said yes. We dated once a week for a month then John was away on a months holiday. I realised I missed him and he phoned several times. When he returned he came straight to see me and we fell into each others arms. From then on we spent more and more time together, met each others families. And we are now moving into a home together and planning our futures. I can honestly say that John has wiped out all my unhappy memories of my marriage breakup. Although John retains loving memories of his long happy marriage he tells me he feels re-born and looks forward to our future years together. We are both now retiring and ready to experience a new life together. Thank you Plenty More Fish!
We are so thrilled you both found happiness through our site and all of us at Plenty More Fish wish you both a long and very happy future together. You are proof that love can find you more than once in life.
If you are still looking for that special someone, why not give us a try? We have three dating ponds for you to choose from. Our Single Pond is aimed at singles from 18-45, our Silver Pond offers dating for the over 40’s and our Naughty Pond is something for the more adventurous among you. Registration on all ponds is FREE, so you can browse for singles in your area right away.
What are you waiting for? Go and cast your net at www.plentymorefish.com.
Happy Dating! x