You have been single for some time now and regularly go on dates in your attempt to find Mr/Miss Right. Yet, somehow it’s not happening and you are slowly beginning lose hope that you will ever find that special person. This is natural and it happened to me too. I was single for almost 2 years and each time I went on a date, I kept thinking to myself, “Gosh, I hope he’s The One!” Needless to say that my high expectations were dashed each time.
So, what’s changed? I told a friend about my situation, and true to her straight shooting character, she bluntly told me to, “just chill”. I was hurt and miffed at first. Didn’t she know how important this was? How serious?
Recalling my most recent dates, I was embarrassed to think of my behaviour, realising I had been trying way too hard and as a result I had scared them all away.
That’s when it hit me. I had turned into Datezilla!
Once my perspective had shifted though, I was able to see dates for what they are, a great opportunity to meet interesting people and I started to make the most of them. I began to have fun and paid attention to the person I was with, rather than analysing each and every word, movement or signal. I began to relax and so did my dates. And it wasn’t long before that special someone popped into my life without me even trying. Funny how these things work out.
So, my dating advice to you singles out there is:
- Listen more, talk less
- Have more fun
- Stop trying so hard
- Be yourself
That’s all you can do. Dating should be fun, not a chore. So, in the words of my (brutally honest) friend, “Just chill.”
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Witnesses have been coming forward reporting an increase in a species called clingoros desperatim or clinger as it’s known in non-scientific circles. A clinger isn’t a new species, nor does it live on board the Enterprise, a clinger is a person (male and female) who after a very brief time of courtship has developed a Velcro-like personality and is infatuated with their object of desire.
These are the top 5 warning signals that you may be one of them:
You’ve had two dates with this person and can’t wait to change your Facebook status from ‘single’ to ‘in a relationship’ and then go and declare your undying love for thou Romeo/Juliet through every possible social media outlet known to mankind and fill your darling’s feeds with soppy love poems.
Agent Double O-M-G
Taking inspiration from the father of all spies, you tell yourself you are no stalker but a secret agent protecting your honey-bunny from potential villains (competition) which means you have to do a background analysis of his/her Facebook posts, photos and friends. You know, just to be safe.
Chat Room Ninja
There you are, watching the chat window waiting for that little light to turn green and then – POW! – you strike those keys with the speed of a King Cobra “Hi sugar dumpling, I’ve missed you so much xxxx!!”
Since you met him or her you have morphed into Gollum quietly stroking your phone whispering “Why haven’t you called me?”, before tenderly kissing the screensaver pic of your boo (which, incidentally, you downloaded from their Facebook profile without their permission). Which leads me to …
…humming your favourite tune again whilst flicking through bridal mags? Or worse, you are trying on an actual wedding dress, even though you haven’t spoken to your beloved long enough to fill a twitter post?
If this sounds like you or someone you know call the CLINGER CONFINEMENT CENTRE on 0800-STOP-IT-NOW.
You see, I wouldn’t call myself romantically challenged by any definition; after all I cried watching Bambi, squeaked with glee when Ross and Rachel finally got together and drew love hearts for 3 weeks after reading Twilight. But when it comes to Valentine’s Day and its subsequent consumerism, I draw the line. I’m glad it’s over for another year. Please don’t think of me as a miserable old mooh but a bouquet on Valentine’s Day just feels like an obligation rather than the token of affection it is intended to be.
This won’t come as any surprise but statistically men are more than happy to go without a gift on Valentine’s Day, as opposed to women who may say they don’t want something, but secretly do. Do we really need grand and predictable gestures to assure ourselves that our Romeo or Juliet is still truly, madly, deeply?
Why is it that we need cards adorned with googly-eyed cupids and nougat filled choc hearts to make us feel loved? Don’t get me wrong I love chocolate/diamonds/flowers/insert-your-favourite as much as any other person but when I think of my other half I don’t think of cards etc. What I see in my mind’s eye, are the little idiosyncrasies that make him unique and which have me gushing….like the way he smiles when I wake him in the morning. His utterly contagious hyena laugh and how he pulls up his cute little chin when he’s concentrating. Like the way only one of his hugs can soothe me after a hectic day and how he can’t remember people’s names but every football score since the first caveman kicked a pebble. The way he chameleon-like propels his tongue out to moisten his fingers when he’s reading the newspaper and his amazing ability to talk to anyone about anything. The way he – even after 11 years – still thinks I’m gorgeous.
This is what makes him special to me and why I love him. 365 days of the year, for the next and the one after that. Now, if you’ll excuse me – I have got to go and eat that box of Thornton’s I gave him for Valentine’s.
What makes a great TV couple? The chemistry? The comedic timing or the audiences’ ability to relate to the screen couple? We asked our friends on Twitter and put our heads together at the Plenty More HQ to come up with some of the best TV couples we’ve ever had grace our screens. From Mulder & Scully all the way to Marge and Homer Simpson, here they are …
(If you have any more you think we should add, just leave a comment below!)
This could be a case for Mulder and Scully…
First up, it’s your favourite paranormal investigators, Mulder and Scully. This couple had the looks, brains and the chemistry. Their platonic relationship throughout the series had us on the edge of our seats…will they or won’t they? Their relationship finally developed into a romantic one a little later in the series. HURRAY!
More than Friends…
We couldn’t possibly go without mentioning Monica and Chandler. After many hints by Chandler, Monica FINALLY cottoned on. Their relationship began as a secret, not wanting the others to make a big deal of it. Their sneaking about continued for sometime and mixed with their great childish humour – made for a very funny watch.
So apparently Kirsty and Phil are not actually together, never have been and never will. *sob* Apparently, Phil is married and Kirsty has a partner. All this may be true but we can’t deny their on-screen chemistry. Admittedly, this is a HUGE reason as to why I watch the programme…it’s like a real life soap!
“I Love You, Marge.” “I Love You Too, Homey.”
Marge and Homer Simpson…ahhh. They have got to be the best cartoon couple around. They’ve been through so much together…even the Homer & Mindy situation but have always managed to patch things up. Marge may sometimes find Homer pretty frustrating to live with but they sure were made for eachother. *Pinches self* Yes, it’s a cartoon, I know… :S
Office fans you will be more than aware of the on-screen flirting between Tim and Dawn. Something always stood in the way of their relationshipdeveloping..mainly Dawns rubbish boyfriend, Lee. If you’re anything like us, you would’ve been shouting at your telly for Dawn to GET RID! Anyway, the Christmas special absolutely melted the hearts of all office fans alike when they finally kissed. YAY!
I’m pretty sure I’ve missed tons of great TV couples out. Who’s your favourite? Leave us a comment below I’ll add them on!
Jen @ Plenty More Fish x
Sometimes, too much dating advice and information can become a little tedious. I feel like it’s time to post something a little fun. Everyone loves cute animal pictures, right? Well, hopefully.
I came across a some fascinating animal pictures and it looks to me like we could learn a few tips from our furry friends.
These pictures are bound to brighten a dreary Monday. Purrrfect! 😉
Tissues at the ready. We’ve been scouring the internet and have found (what we think may be) the 10 best marriage proposals caught on camera. Saying that, if you come across any you think should make the list please add in a comment below!
1. Unexpected Cinema Trailer Proposal
2. Fallen Head Over Heals!
3. Central Park Proposal
4. A Disneyland Proposal
5. A “Surprising” Marriage Proposal
6. Engagement on the set of Scrubs
7. Weatherman Proposal
8. Circus Performer Proposal
9. Rooftop Proposal
10. Old Spice Marriage Proposal
I recently came across a 2008 university study discussing the way Rom-Coms can help to promote unrealistic expectations about love and relationships. They found that we are influenced by portrayals in the media – more than we realise.
This made me wonder whether love and relationship expectations could stem even further than this? I remembered all the Disney movies I used to watch as a kid, my burning desire to run (or fly) off into the sunset with Aladdin and my dream for thinner, more lady-like feet so I could easily slip them into THAT dainty glass slipper.
Without hesitation, I created a poll and took to Plenty More Fish fans and followers on Twitter and Facebook. As you can see a whopping 62% of you reckon fairy tales do give out an unrealistic view of love and relationships.
Phew, so it’s not just me.
Thanks to my childhood obsession with Disney films I’m adamant I adopted an unrealistic view of love and relationships from a very early age. Prince charming rescuing you and dropping everything to be with you, sure. Being able to date a beauty even though you look like an angry hairy beast, absolutely. Stealing the heart of a handsome prince regardless of being half girl, half fish, of course. Oh and sharing a bowl of spaghetti bolognaise could in fact be the most romantic thing you’ll ever do.
The latter- not true, for sure.
I’m not saying BAN DISNEY…I LOVE Disney and I’m not saying you can’t live happily ever after. I just think perhaps they should’ve come up with a sequel to Cinderella, Beauty & The Beast, Aladin, The Lady & The Tramp…etc and show that relationships actually need work. When the honeymoon period is over, most relationships have there ups and downs and good communication is absolutely key.
Oh and DON’T get me started on period dramas. 😉
Jen from Plenty More Fish x