Let’s be honest, dating is not all rainbows and puppy dogs. It takes time and patience and there can be disappointments and rejections along the way. And it’s those rejections we’d like to address to help you navigate them more easily.
Don’t take it personally
You have no idea what reasons the other person has for not getting back in touch, so fretting about it does more harm than good. We know it’s not always that simple, especially if you have dated the person for a while. Think about it this way, if they don’t share your feelings about the relationship, isn’t it best if you move on?
No one likes to be rejected and it’s perfectly normal to feel upset and hurt at first. And if you’ve been dropped without any explanation it can hit you especially hard. It’s important, however, to practice self-kindness, as blaming yourself will only hurt you further. Unless you’ve been given a very clear reason why it’s not worked out, avoid jumping to conclusions as to why it didn’t last. There may be many reasons why he/she decided to break it off and they don’t have to be your fault.
Avoid a victim mindset
On the flipside of blaming yourself is blaming the other party. After a rejection, it can be very easy to slip into a victim mentality by generalising behaviour (ie. all men/woman are…). This may feel good at first, and it certainly feels easier than looking in the mirror, but in the long-term, this mindset will sabotage any real chances at finding new love and keep you feeling stuck and powerless. Again, acknowledge your feelings but don’t dwell.
After a rejection, especially when we listen to our critical inner voice, it’s easy for self-doubt and insecurities to raise their ugly heads and can leave us feeling less sure of ourselves. When we’ve been left by someone, we may find ourselves feeling out of place. It may become difficult to visit certain places, see certain people, or partake in activities for a while. However, this situation presents an opportunity to really connect with our individuality, your own needs. What is it that you enjoy doing? Who are you outside of a relationship? Focussing on defining yourself anew again, can get you out of heartbreak-mode much faster. Realising that you have a whole life outside of whatever rejection you’ve experienced, and that life will go on.
So, this is Christmas! The most wonderful time of the year is upon us and the age-old question of what to get your f-buddy for the festive period? Your relationship is strictly casual and naughty as hell but what do you do about Christmas presents?
With any casual and naughty relationship, boundaries need to be super clear from the get-go. Your relationship is simply for benefits and hookups and that works for you.
But who doesn’t love receiving something special for Christmas?
The bonus of gifting your naughty match at Christmas is that you can go as naughty as you want and there’s no judgement! You can go wild and buy things that would fulfil your every sexual fantasy! There’s no need to go boring with Christmas gifts and you can even get something interactive that you can use when you next hook up!
If you’re going to gift this Christmas, why not go with sexy underwear – for you and for them? You could shop till you drop buying things like crotchless knickers, edible panties or even edible boxers. You could all out and get something for your beau to dress up in just for you! If you’re into firemen or nurses, get them a sexy outfit for you to feast your eyes on when you’re next together!
A great naughty gift is food – fun with food in the bedroom can be sensuous, dirty and freaky as hell! Why not get some edible licks and lubes and give each other a full taste of Christmas? If you want to go vanilla this festive season, you can always jazz it up with flavoured lube! If you love cherry flavoured everything, you could have a party in your mouth and in your pants!
If you really want to spice things up this Christmas you could buy your casual match a sex toy to play with while you’re apart and when you’re together and things are getting hot! You can easily shop online for vibrators, bullets you can put in your handbag for discretion, love eggs, butt plugs – the lot! You can buy it all online easily and it’ll land on your doorstep in unbranded boxes ready for you to slip under the Christmas tree!
Why not buy some sex games? Start with some sexy card games, truth or dare and more! You’ll be laughing and getting down and dirty in no time! Novelty gifts always go down well – you can get your match novelty pants that say “69 me!” or sex cheques or go really silly with sexy scratch cards and jelly boobs! Get your stresses out with stress boobs or bake a naughty pre-hook up dinner with willy pasta!
If you’re in a naughty, casual relationship this Christmas, don’t be afraid to gift – but do it the right way! Don’t take it all too seriously and get ready to get hot under the collar!
And if you’re looking to find someone for some naughty holiday fun and hookups, why not join Plenty More Naughty Fish now? Jump into the naughty pond and start adult dating now!
Let’s face it, December is an expensive time of year for most of us but your dating life should not have to suffer because of it. So here are our favourite affordable and fun date ideas for this month.
Get your skate one
Remember how much fun you had as a kid whizzing – or crawling – across the ice? Plenty of city centres now have ice rinks at this time of year so there’s really no excuse not to give it a try. Not only is it loads of fun but it is sure you get you very close to your date, especially if they are not as accomplished in the arts of ice skating and will need to hold on to you for balance. Afterwards, you can warm up with a hot toddy and laugh about your sore bottoms.
Have a bake-off
Who doesn’t love the smell of freshly baked Christmas cookies, so why not have a bake-off? Each person picks one recipe and you ask friends and family to judge your efforts. The loser will have to cook the next meal, sing a Christmas carol in front of their family or come up with the next fun date idea. Make it interesting, get creative!
Mix it up
Whilst on the subject of food, we mustn’t forget the impressive art of cocktail making. Mixing your way through different cocktail recipes is another fun way to ‘expand’ your horizons so to speak. You could book one of the many cocktail making classes available, buy a book on the topic or simply Google some recipes to try. You could even create your own signature drink for you both. Wouldn’t that be a cute story to share one day?
Lend a hand
The true meaning of Christmas is to give, so why not spread some cheer and volunteer at a local charity or start a fundraiser to help those less fortunate? You could do a sponsored sleep out, a Santa Fun Run or create a gift-wrapped shoebox full of nice things and send it off to a disadvantaged child. There are so many ways to give (just search ‘Volunteer at Christmas’). It’s sure you make you all warm and fuzzy afterwards. And who knows? This might just be the start of an annual family tradition.
Shake a leg
Hit a local karaoke bar or stay at home to create a playlist with all your favourite Christmas tunes. Have a musical pop quiz or a dance-off in your PJs. You could even write your own nativity play or compose the next Christmas number 1. There are so many ways to have a music-themed date that you’ll be spoilt for choice but you can have some awesome fun. Up the ante and post your creations online for your friends to vote on and spread some cheer. It’s all about having fun!
We hope you like our favourite December date ideas. Have one to share with us? Then drop us a comment!
Still looking for that special someone? Try Plentymorefish.com and find singles near you today!
So you’re on a naughty dating site, maybe Plenty More Naughty Fish, and you’re ready to take the plunge and start flirting with sexy singles online! It’s fun, it’s exciting, it’s fast-paced! But there are some big do’s and don’ts for naughty online dating!
We’ve outlined some of the do’s and some of the definitely nots for dating on Plenty More Naughty Fish so that you can concentrate on flirting, messaging and hooking up!
- Be honest. Your profile is a great opportunity to show off everything that’s amazing about you – but make sure you’re honest. You can share your sexual preferences: oral lover, anal hater etc. but it’s important to be yourself. It can be tempting to create an online persona but believe us, it’s hard to maintain and gets boring very quickly when you don’t get the matches you’re after!
- Be open. If you love water sports or strip teases really get you going – tell people about it! If you know exactly what makes you tick and what turns you off then you can use Plenty More Naughty Fish’s great search features to help you find it!
- Add a photo of yourself. By doing this, you’ll qualify your potential suitors to you easily. They’ll be able to see what you look like and message you – it’s much less scary than messaging someone with no photo. Your photos can be sexy but leave a little bit to the imagination!
- Update your profile. Your online dating profile is your shop window. If it isn’t updated very often or isn’t updated at all, the likeliness is that no one will want to go shopping with you! If your profile has lots of interesting and up to date information about yourself, you could make your dating and hooking up sessions easier!
- Have XXX snaps. While it can be tempting to add your sexiest pictures to your profile, it’s always good to make sure you leave something to the inevitable suspense between you and your next hookup! Sexy snaps are a yes, explicit snaps should be avoided!
- Be a player. We get it, you’re online, you’re getting messages flying in from left right and centre. You could be messaging loads of singles at any one time. But remember that the fun of naughty dating is finding a long term friend with benefits and not dropping people after one rendezvous. Hookups are better when you know each other on a deeper level, the fun is waiting to meet and shag! Play the game but don’t tread on people!
- Bombard people. Be open to messages and flirting but don’t be that person who sends someone loads of messages and is too much. It’s an instant turn off, takes away the mystery and turns fun into annoyance!
Naughty online dating is meant to be fun, flirty and filled with frolics. With our tips, tricks and do’s and don’ts your naughty dating experience could be filled with sexy fun and hookups!
You’re ready to jump into the Naughty Pond – there’s plenty more naughty fish in the sea, get your swimming gear on and jump right in – paddlers are also welcome!
To join Plenty More Naughty Fish click here!
As if breaking up wasn’t hard enough already, divorcing or separating after many years can feel devastating and the thought of ever loving someone else may seem impossible at first. Most people will experience a sense of grief and go through these 5 stages. They are:
- Denial and isolation
So how do you know if you are ready to get back out there and start dating again? Here are a few things that you should consider before you get back on that proverbial dating horse:
Accept that it’s over
Seems like an obvious one but this is a vital step helping you be open for something new. First, make sure you’ve come to terms with your marriage/relationship being over and that you have accepted it. Reaching this stage can take a long time – sometimes years – so be patient and allow yourself to heal first.
The ex is dating again
Remember that acceptance we’ve just mentioned? That resolve can be tested when you see your ex with someone new for the first time. Be prepared for this to trigger emotions you thought you’d dealt with. Seeing him/her with another partner can really hurt and trigger feelings of jealousy and undo all the positive steps you’ve taken since the breakup. At this point, it is important to remember that it’s ok to feel those emotions but not allow them to overwhelm you. Remembering that you and your ex may be at different stages in life will help you remain objective. And that you both deserve to be happy – even if it’s with someone else.
Meeting the kids
Sit down with your children and talk to them about this step waaay before you start dating again. Especially if your kids are older. Helping them navigate their own grieving process will allow the family to heal as a whole before they reach the stage of acceptance. So be gentle and give them time to get used to the idea of you dating again. Just don’t put it off altogether – you too deserve to be happy!
Begin to redefine who you are outside of the marriage/relationship by spending quality time on your own. Take yourself out to dinner or the cinema. You’ve always wanted to try Salsa dancing but your partner did not? Go and do that! By rebuilding your own sense of identity you’ll get your confidence back and will begin to see all the exciting opportunities out there.
As they say, “Time is the wisest counsellor of all.” I think we can agree that taking time out from dating after a breakup is a good strategy. One way to find out if the time is right to dip your toe in that dating pond again is to try visualising yourself with someone else. If you feel a sense of excitement – great – you are ready! If however, you struggle to do that, it’s safe to say you need a bit more time and space until you can. It’s ok to take as much time as you need!
A friend of mine said the other day: “Women are complicated beings. They never say what they really mean. Why is that?”
It’s a very good question and I’m sure he’s not the only guy out there struggling to decipher girl code. Essentially women’s way of communication are motivated differently. They care about other’s opinions and their feelings. They are consensus-driven, which is why we are often not as direct in our responses.
Now let’s take a look at the five most commonly used phrases and decode them for you:
Okay, you probably know by now that when a woman says these two words, it usually means she’s frustrated or upset with something or someone and all she really wants is to be listened to. The easiest way to deal with this is to calmly ask what really bothers her. Say something like, “I sense you are not happy. Tell me what’s bothering you and help me understand.” Knowing when your girl is upset means you care, and talking to her about it will only earn you bonus points.
“I don’t care. Do whatever you want.”
Whatever you do, don’t take this statement at face value. You’ll need to read her body language here. She probably did not say this with a big smile on her face as she kissed you goodbye and took off to do her own thing, did she? This statement is usually expressed when the boyfriend decides he doesn’t want to spend time with her but do something else instead. The uncoded version of this statement is: “You don’t care about me and don’t want to spend time with me.” Deal with this in a sensitive manner. If you committed to spending time with her, it’s important to honour that commitment. If you have to change your plans due to unforeseen circumstances, tell her you are sorry and you will make it up to her. Then follow through with it. She will see you are considered and that she’s important to you.
“Do I look fat?” or “Do I look ugly?”
Here’s the decoded version: “I could use a compliment.”
Many women suffer from insecurities and the simple solution to this is genuine compliments from the man she cares about. It doesn’t take much effort, so go for it. All she needs at that moment is for someone else to make her feel special and remind her that she’s beautiful. Pick your favourite things about her and tell her. Feeling inadequate physically can be draining for a woman in today’s world and can seep into other aspects of her life. Stop these crummy feelings before they have a chance to grow, and don’t forget to make your woman feel like a goddess from time to time.
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
This one can be tricky because sometimes it really is true. Women just need time to really think about why they are upset about something before they can talk to others about it. If she means it, then she will give you both some space and let you know when she is ready to talk. Until then, don’t push her.
However, when your girlfriend is telling a bit of a fib, you need to encourage her to talk. You can usually tell the difference in the tone of her voice. If she is relatively calm and speaking in normal tones, then give her space. But if the tension is palpable, then get in there and talk to her. Stewing over your problems is not going to help her attitude about the situation later, so the best course of action is to address how she feels immediately. Talking things out is part of how many women deal with all sorts of problems, and you need to be a part of the discussion. Ask yourself this: Do I want her to talk to me about our problems or someone else who doesn’t know the whole story? The answer should be obvious.
“I don’t need you.”
A woman might say this to her man when they are fighting and she feels vulnerable. Guys, what she really means is that she does need you, but she’s afraid you’re slipping away. There is a lot of pressure on women these days to not be so emotional or to prove they are as capable as men. But the bottom line is that women have feelings — deep feelings — that can make them feel very vulnerable when things aren’t going quite right. “I don’t need you” means your lady is trying to convince herself she’ll be okay if she ends up losing you. The truth is she’s really hurting inside.
Comfort her. Reassure her that you aren’t going anywhere. Even if you are boiling mad or trying to convince yourself of the same thing, try to take a breath and talk calmly about what is happening. You will make this moment easier on her and on yourself. Address how she honestly feels, and make it clear that you both need each other. Communication is the key.
Gentlemen, the takeaway here is that your girlfriends are not out to get you or punish you for obscure reasons. If your girl isn’t saying what she really means, then you are going to have to listen and give her a reason to trust you with the truth. Knowing that you care will be enough to get her to open up.
For better or for worse, following this advice will crack the girl code in your relationships.
Now, spread the word to your bros and find the truth behind her words!
Autumn has arrived in a flurry and your nights of meeting sexy singles on long sunny days out and hooking up from beer garden acquaintances are no more – until next summer! The sun is gone, replaced by the rain, the wind and the desire to stay inside! Autumn can be beautiful but it can also put a massive dampener on your sex life!
Enter Plenty More Naughty Fish – jump into the naughty pond this autumn and you could soon be hooking up with naughty singles who want no strings attached fun, naughty encounters and one night stands! Joining the Naughty Pond means you’ll be going for no strings attached dating with complete ease. You can match, chat and flirt from the comfort of your room. You can watch the rain batter your windows as you plan sexy date nights and hot hookups. You can take your naughty dates on the go with your phone, tablet or laptop and there’s never been a better season to join the naughty pond!
Once you find one or two sexy singles who want nothing but casual fun and hookups, you can plan sexy meets and opportunities to get down and dirty!
The rain outside means there’s no bar hopping or restaurant choosing. You can take it back to basics by and really strip things back – literally!
Why not plan a dirty date night at home, avoiding the rain and wind while getting each other’s juices flowing? You could keep things casual with a film on in the background, a nice glass of wine and then making a pillow fort in the living room. You could play strip poker or play anything that will get you both naked as soon as possible!
Naughty adult dating doesn’t have to be boring – you could have a no clothes in the bedroom rule – as soon as either of you enters the room you’ll need to strip – that’ll get pulses racing!
If the weather calms down you could plan an evening out in a bar with live music and plenty of naughty corners. You could listen to your favourite tunes, dirty dance together and hide away in the hidden crevices where no one can see what you’re up to!
You could take the night home with chips and a kebab and experiment with food in the bedroom!
Talking of food… why not plan a date on the sofa with all of your favourite foods – to eat off of each other? You won’t be able to watch the film while watching each other slather yourselves in hot chocolate, raspberry sauce and more!
Autumn and naughty dating can go hand in hand! There’s no better time to take things home and get better acquainted! Skip the boring date, the meaningless chat and get straight to business together in the comfort of your own homes!
Jump in the Naughty Pond this autumn by joining Plenty More Naughty Fish now!