How to Nail Talking Dirty
Talking dirty seems to be an aspect of sex we either shy away from or delve into. We get too worried about saying the wrong thing or embarrassing ourselves that sometimes talking dirty can become unnatural and awkward, when really it is simple. If you find it difficult to talk dirty or you just want to feel more confident doing so, then we’ve got a few tips for you to use that will soon make you a pro.
Set the scene
It may sound cliché but setting the scene can help dirty talk flow easier. It requires mental preparation; you want to think about what you want to say. Particularly if you’re looking at divulging into your fantasies, you need to think about how you’re going to bring it up, so it doesn’t become too forward or brash. The confidence you will exude by communicating with your partner will make you look sexier.
Not only can you prepare mentally, but you can also set the room. Maybe light a few candles or simply turn down the light a little. It’s been said that creating ambience in the room can make you and your love more open to experimenting.
Start with a question
Most people get stuck about what to say when talking dirty, there’s this perception that it has to sound like an erotic novel or trash talk, otherwise you’re not doing it right. But that’s not the case. You can simply start by asking a question about what you’re doing to your partner. “Do you like the way I’m…”. Then ask another question which could allow a more erotic response, more open ended. “What else would you…”. By asking your lover what they enjoy doing and/or receiving during sex can be very empowering for both of you.
Tell them what you’re going to do
If you don’t feel like asking questions, then take the reigns and tell your partner what you’re going to do to them. You could then ask a question after to see what else they would like you to do. This one is a win-win because both sides get to see what their lover really likes and gets turned on by. You may find that your lover may get turned on by dominance, you telling them what you’re going to do to them
Talk about what you see
Visual stimuli during sex is a major turn on for some. You can make comments about how great your partner’s body looks or how good it feels when they touch you. By focussing the attention on the physical actions that are happening and the body, your partner also gets an idea of what you like. Seeing you enjoy their actions, could turn them on further.
Talk about what you want
The key with asking for what you want is not coming across as though you’re complaining or being whiny. You should remain calm, cool and sexy, not demanding. If it’s done right, your partner will love the extra help in satisfying your needs. Asking for what you like can come across as a confident move and therefore making you sexier in the bedroom.
Talking softly into your partner’s ear can get them excited, after all whispering is sultry and sexy. A simple phrase like “I want you” or “I need you” can turn on your partner, leaving them wanting you to say more. Knowing that someone else wants you is a sexually gratifying statement, which can help with confidence in the bedroom.
Although we did mention that talking dirty doesn’t have to be like an Erotica novel, it certainly helps to read them. If you’re really looking at stepping up your game, it might be a good idea to delve into the world of erotica. The whole point of dirty talk is to use phrases that turn you on, by reading erotica you’re wanting to find that phrases that do that exact thing to you. Maybe there’s a sentence that makes you flutter or maybe just how they describe an action. But pay attention to how your body reacts to the erotica and see how you could work it into the bedroom.
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