Little Lies vs Honesty
We all know the lyrics to the Fleetwood Mac Song ‘Little Lies’, a song about a relationship where one party chooses to believe the little lies rather than see the truth and change the situation. An analogy that can often be applied to online dating profiles. Most of us have been on a date where when we meet some of the things written on their profile just don’t add up and it is obvious they’ve been a little more creative than they should be.
But why? What’s the point?
Fact. Online dating, whilst fun is also grueling on the soul. In the busy pond of singles looking for love how on earth do you make your profile stand out against the hundreds of thousands of others hoping Cupid’s arrow will strike? Surely by being a little more creative with your profile you’re showing flair and individualism? Not quite.
The problem is that whilst creativity and flair would have got you top marks at school; when you’re looking for ‘the one’ you need to tell it how it is and be honest about your personality, what you are looking for and the traits you like or dislike. Turning your dating profile into work of fiction is not the smartest move.
Honesty is the best policy
The dilemma most online daters go over in their head is that being honest will come back and bite them and can sometimes backfire. Try looking at it another way. If you’ve been honest about yourself and what you’re looking for and a potential match takes umbrage with this were they really for you anyway?
Whether you’re a young singleton, an older dater or someone looking for a casual relationship it is important to write a profile that makes it clear what you want from a potential partner, what you are like as a person and your stand out personality traits.
Those of us in the category of ‘silver daters‘ should stay away from cliches such as ‘seeks companion’, ‘happy in own company’, ‘well settled in own ways’ – these would all indicate that friendship rather than a relationship is more important. Equally avoid phrases such as ‘light-hearted’, ‘funny’, ‘good sense of humour’ – after all, you’re looking for a meaningful relationship not a daily dose of the comedy club.
Words are vital when writing your online dating profile. The wrong ones can be an instant turn off and the right ones could bag you the perfect date. So what are the key ‘trigger words’ that make a standout profile?
Not surprisingly men look for women with words like ‘ambitious’ and ‘confident’ in their profile and women look for male profiles with the words ‘intelligent’ and ‘sincere’. The more positive descriptions you can use the better. For the female daters amongst us try incorporating words such as ‘hard working’, ‘thoughtful’, ‘motivated’ and ‘compassionate’. For the male daters build your profile using ‘spontaneous’, ‘outgoing’ and ‘perceptive’.
An honest well thought and well-written profile will trigger a natural emotional response from a potential date. Whilst you might want to be a little creative and go into your love of traveling and a passion for cats these are not the facts that are going to get your profile grabbing the attention of Mr or Mrs Right!
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